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Toxic Relationships

This ‘Toxic Relationship Trap’ is insidious and spread over a long period of time and makes you believe it is ‘true, intense, soul-stirring love,’ and all the small-everyday-spats with your loved one (partner, spouse, sibling, parent, work colleague or just anyone you feel this attachment towards) are just benign disagreements.  Mundane, ordinary fights.  Arguments that you both painstakingly spend time resolving.  What better proof of love? Except, the issue is never resolved and becomes the undercurrent of your relationship.  A significant ‘fault’ of yours, which you believe you can make your partner understand in time, and start to take on the burden of the success of the relationship on your shoulders. 

 

You have struggled for long, are tired and do not recognise the person you were before you got into this trap or relationship as you believe you are in.

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What are the signs that you are in a ‘Toxic-Relationship’ Trap?

 

  • You feel loved and understood like never before. Yet you’re lost.

  • It feels like an emotional roller coaster ride.

  • You feel there are petty fights where you are blamed.

  • You feel like saving the one you love.

  • There are long spells of unrest within you, where you cannot put a finger on what is wrong exactly.

  • You are confused about how love should look like.

  • You live in a state of not trusting your own perception of ongoing situations or feelings.

  • Your needs go increasingly and glaringly unmet.

  • Your beliefs about ideal love were matched and met like magic, yet there is an overriding sense of disconnection with yourself.

  • Intense disconnection with the world, your friends and family, like they cannot understand what you are going through.

  • You cannot understand what you are going through.

  • You live in a constant state of denial when you think things are not right and yet make excuses to hold on to any shreds of ‘feel good’ emotions.

  • You have high levels of stress and anxiety always concerning your relationship and are always looking to make it right, believing it is just round the corner.

  • You feel responsible for the things that do not go right.

  • You take on all the blame or are blamed for the mess of the relationship.

  • You try to make things right, change a lot of your personality and barely resemble who you were before the relationship, to make it go back to those golden moments.

  • The ‘ideal’ version of you is still far off regardless of the changes you have made and you feel very lost and defeated.

  • You walk around on eggshells wondering what will set off triggers and upset your partner.

  • You constantly think and overanalyse events and circumstances.

  • Your needs of security, love and belonging are no longer ideally met as you thought they were, yet you remain in denial.

  • You want to get out but feel that you cannot live without this person.

  • You feel stuck and a sense of responsibility towards your partner.

  • You feel obligated to set the relationship in order.

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You are not to blame.  It is our innate nature to fall in love and to seek out meaning and belonging in those we give love to and receive love from.  It is not a sign of weakness, it is essential.

 

The scaffolding needs in Maslow’s Theory of Hierarchy of Needs explains that unless a set of needs is more or less met, only then do we humans move to the next level.  Hence, when the basic needs of food and clothing are met, the individual will be motivated to search for the next level of need, that of the need for safety or a home, job, health and family.  Only after this need is met to the extent they wish, then will the individual focus on the next and so on.

 

As per this hierarchy, Level 3 & 4 needs are emotions such as love, acceptance, intimacy, trust, belonging and self-esteem.  These are very important and necessary drivers of all humans and are considered a normal form of motivation.  The presence of these emotions is a healthy state of being of all individuals. 

 

Hence, love and belonging and self-esteem are intrinsic components of human motivation and there is a correlation between our requirement as humans of the fulfilling of these in order to go to the next level of self-actualization where we endeavour to create the best versions of ourselves. 

 

Maslow’s correlation is sometimes, intentionally misused by those that claim to love you and care for you.  Your needing the motivation from love and care is not wrong at all, however, the possibility of misuse, is unknown to you and hence would never occur to you to doubt, suspect or assess that, when things are so good, or perhaps not so good also and you attribute it to factors that can be worked upon.

 

The Toxic Trap is when faulty wiring in some individuals guides them to hone in on your unmet needs and use those as a smoke screen for supplying the love and acceptance that all individuals so intrinsically require.

 

Toxicity instils in these human beings an acute awareness of those needs of people and they play out their part of being the ‘perfect match’ to your unmet needs.

 

It is not a mutual love, admiration and respect that they feel for you, rather a deeper more insidious game unfolding of predator and prey.  You do not realize that you are being preyed upon until you see cyclical signs of intense emotional pain embedded innocuously in the declarations and ‘fake’ actions of love, care and acceptance.

 

You unwittingly fall prey to this as you are not accustomed to the devious ways of love and cannot and do not see it coming.  You do get a sense of something wrong, but cannot fully understand or piece together the wrong and the missing pieces.  You believe it is a broken individuals’ attempt at love and so get so enmeshed in trying to saving them, or fixing what is broken,  that you end up lost and confused in the emotional drama that ensues.

 

Since your needs of love and belonging have been so perfectly matched you do not question the intent of the person and believe small changes can sort the issue out.

 

Thus, as normal, healthy human beings we look for love and belonging and hence we do not go about suspecting that the reciprocity of love and belonging could be abusive or sinister or planned out like an elaborate deceitful web of lies to supply a silent, misleading, insidious and dangerous personality disorder called Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Abusers with NPD feign love and create a quiet form of veiled emotional and psychological abuse for the ‘object’ of their love and attention, that remains hidden from the ‘survivor (you)’ due to lack of bruises or scars or any outward form of abuse.  Make no mistake, this is abuse and deceit at the highest, most fraudulent level, intentionally carried out from the start, to trap you and make you ‘fall’ in love and then when you are hooked onto this ‘illusion of a relationship,’ to show you traits of the real person, which leaves you confused, because those traits are tangentially opposite to the ones that got you hooked on to this relationship, in the first place.

 

This relationship is classified as ‘Narcissistic Abuse’.  You are being abused. Severely and more harmfully than you can imagine.  You could never have imagined that this is abuse and you are the victim or the ‘survivor’.  All the signs and symptoms and behaviours of narcissists are textbook and can be applied verbatim to anyone who has NPD and/or is in a relationship with a NPD person.  Survivor because this is a very harmful form of abuse for you and will take everything you have to break off and ‘survive.’  Ironically, It is not the relationship that helps you survive and you have to come an understanding of that yourself.  You have to be willing to set aside all your romantic notions of your partner and see it.  You have been unable to see it so far because of the nature of the biochemical addiction of this kind of love.  While on the face of it you feel like this partner is  your soulmate, a rare love you must hold on to, however, on an internal level, (unknown to you), this relationship has activated all your insecurities and abandonment issues you never thought you had and therefore, your complete inability to see a life without the partner or even believe that it is possible.

 

With the intermittent highs or rewards of love,  adoration and companionship mixed with the sudden, stark and abrupt emotional lows of a cold, withdrawn and distant partner, you are left with biological, physiochemical and biochemical changes in your body that cause you to ‘be addicted’ and ‘not be able to see’ the truth about this relationship and believe only, that you can save it or change it.  And so goes on and on the vicious cycle of your trying harder and receiving and then again very quickly falling short and trying again to restore it to the old levels of euphoria you felt at the start of it.

 

REALIZING this ‘Toxic Trap’ is a shocking but freeing discovery and if you find any of the symptoms of your relationship mimic the signs I have mentioned above, it is because, there is a science to it.

 

People with NPD dole out narcissistic emotional abuse with ease and charm.  They are ordinary people amongst us, no red flags of mental or behavioural disorders, until the insanity you experience in the relationship gets intensified and you’re reeling and spinning and yearning for a sliver of normalcy.  You are so invested (biochemically) by then, that you cannot recognise the signs and do not suspect that a con is at its best game.  Almost always will this kind of a narcissistic relationship lead to health problems, behavioural problems and a lot of hurt, trauma and emotional pain.  Even when realization dawns upon you, you will find yourself ‘addicted’ and stuck due to the highs and lows of cortisol (stress hormone) and dopamine (reward neurotransmitter) – causing a ‘trick (you’re tricked/conned into believing them and that it’s your fault) or treat (reward of love and semblance of their old kind ways)’ syndrome in you – moments of kindness and love as reward and long spells of circular fights and confusion and disconnectedness with your life and the truth of everything around you.  That makes it biologically and physiologically very difficult for you to extricate yourself and creates trauma bonding in you with the abuser.  Hence, explaining why abuse victims stay on in abusive situations.  The victims’ neurotransmitters have been conditioned to respond in a particular manner.

 

When you realise that your relationship is actually a planned siege from the start, meant to provide narcissistic supply to the abuser – as a means of dealing with their own internal suffering and self-loathing; you begin to piece together the elements of your own suffering and begin your own journey self ward.  This is your most catalysing moment and one that aligns you to receive the gifts lined up for you by your Universal Source.

 

It becomes about your recovery from narcissistic abuse, from here on out, and not about matching up the symptoms or least of all about the abuser and their reasons.

 

 

The TOXIC TRAP therefore, is that, all this while you believed your relationship was perhaps `toxic,’ but never, till now, did you realise, that that exact notion of it has you trapped.  You’re trapped because you think it is an ordinary, normal relationship, with normal challenges and so keep trying to sort and iron out issues, getting into solution mode or saving mode.  This is the trap.

 

You can never win this one.  You can at best figure out ways to get out if you can or retain whatever semblance of sanity you have left.

 

It is not as simple as being just ‘toxic’ and goes way beyond that.  It is meant to be sinister and intended to shatter and break you completely.  That was the purpose of this ‘love-scam.’ To scam you into believing it was love.  To get you hooked to revel and relish in the sense of schadenfreude it gives them. Joy in another’s misery.  It gives them a sense of twisted self-importance and exposes their sense of loathing they feel for themselves. This you understand only in retrospect.  Your abuser lacks empathy and will never see nor understand what you valued about this ‘relationship’ and if you try to go that way, you will end up broken, if not dead. In your heart and mind you believe it is a normal relationship, but it is time to see that you are wrong in believing so.

 

The narcissistic abuser has the charm, skill and intelligence to understand exactly what your ‘love and belonging’ needs are and project themselves as an exact match for you, sweep you off your feet and make you feel comfortable in the relationship.  This is their A game and this is their meaning.  Making you fall for them and then seeing you writhe in emotional pain is their high. Their objective is to erode your strength, your self-esteem and confidence and make you weak and needy.  The more you need them, the more it supplies them with a sense of belonging and gives them their warped sense of worth.  By in turn being cold and exuberant in their supply of love to you, they activate your fears of ‘losing’ a relationship/companion you feel secure with and thus constantly goad your insecurities and keep you enmeshed.

 

They have manipulated you so many times with their sudden withdrawal and equally random and sudden return of their old, loving ways, that it has triggered in you a heightened sense of constant insecurity and has got you mimicking their feelings of jealousy and neediness and wanting you to be constantly reassured by them of the dregs of love and care that was your original reason for the perfect match.

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES FOR YOU -  CAN BE FOUND HERE: KNOWLEDGE IS POWER IN TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS - KNOWING ABOUT THEM GIVES YOU STRENGTH.

 

Build Your Emotional Muscle & Don’t Get Sucked In

 

No calls, no WhatsApp’s, no messages, no interest from you activates my feeling of injury and my childhood wound of rejection and neglect.  Triggers me completely.

 

It is an accumulation of all the decades of rejection triggers stored in my subconsciousness and all of those getting activated.  All at one go. Hence the high charge and obsession of triggering thoughts that push me over the edge of self-dismissal to self-sabotage. Every time. Without fail. I am no one without you.  I am unlovable without you.  Even by me.  There is nothing worth loving in me.

 

When you are an IV-drop interested in me or at my lucky times, over-interested in me, then you activate my appreciation of myself. 

 

When you suddenly disappear on me again or fight with me, you trigger my rejection, you trigger my injury and my fear of abandonment and inferiority.  Both – your interest and your disappearance are intertwined to punish me and to provide reinforcement to me. This keeps me physiologically addicted to you and hooks me into wanting to see some message or call or need of you needing me back. I am waiting to hear from you.  I keep checking my phone again and again.  I am linked to the needy image I have of myself.  Instead of the brave girl that I was then and am now.

 

By not messaging or calling or blocking me, you replicate the heavy charge of my early attachment injury, inferiority and rejection and in turn, I replay that scene again and again as me – not being attractive enough, not being intelligent, being neglected, being treated unfairly, siblings being preferred over me, me not being seen, not knowing what to say, wanting to keep the drama alive, and all the fears that I have been conditioned and trained with and carried around are now automatically magnified. Infinite-fold. You confirm by these acts that I am ‘rejectable.’ I feel it deep in my soul.  And then I actually do reject myself as if I have been hypnotized to not see all the great things about me. I do not see anything great. Only that I have lost you because I am a loser. I only see that I did something wrong. That I pushed you away because I am damaged.  I have so many faults and I just didn’t get it right.  I was not enough to be loved by you and for you to carry on loving me the way you once did.  I know I am bonded through a kind of trauma that taught me to wait. To endure your silent treatment and not realize there was something wrong.

 

You are the trigger to my thoughts and emotions going out of whack and causing so much turmoil in me – that keeps re-playing in me.  Within me, there is a constant undercurrent of “you are being rejected, you are not good enough, see its true that you are invisible, even he is gone, no one wants to listen to you, you are not loved, there is no one for you, you don’t have it, he’s too busy for you, you were inadequate, you blew it, you made a mess of it” and the chatter goes on and on and on.  I do not realize that my brain was taught to doubt me and trained to please the one who had the fault.  I jumped through hoops to be approved of by my earliest caregiver.  I realize I had to do more to get the love my siblings got.

 

I see today that it was not about me.  I see now that they were the ones who were hollow and who instead filled me with doubt about myself and my capabilities.

 

Your behavior makes me sad and makes me wait for you to realize your mistake and what you are missing, namely, me.  Sometimes it makes me feel that I did not know how to treat you and maybe I was too harsh and argumentative and did not get it right.

 

I am the eternal optimist and I know you will come back.  It is for my re-affirmation of myself that I am waiting.  I wait so that I know that my love mattered to you.  That I mattered. I wait to feel that I was not your mistake. I wait so I can feel that I was not unlovable, I was not all that bad, I was not so unacceptable or not fun, or unwitty or unattractive. “  I wait to get re-confirmation of all that you had said about me, and now in a swift instant you have taken it all back, taken it away and left.

 

How can it be so swift and harsh?  How can you cheat on me like this? Did I not mean anything to you?

 

It is still an act on their part. It was always about control for him.  To see how much of me needed him till the point it got unbearable for me and I was willing to make fluid a lot of my boundaries.  For the sake of love.  And I let all of my ambitions, strengths and resources just disappear for the sake of a masked person – who did not show me their truth.

 

“I am still waiting for you to 'see me' 'love me back' to be 'heard' 'loved' 'seen'  again.” The injured part of me was not seen loved or heard.  And you did see me and love me and accept me and find me attractive and interesting.  So I found my closest match in you.

 

You had validated me.  Where are you now?

 

 

YOU MAY DO THIS ASSIGNMENT AND FIND NEW INSIGHTS AND ANSWERS AND LIGHTEN THE BURDEN CARRIED BY YOU:

 

Q1.  WRITE AN ESSAY LIKE THIS ONE – THAT BRINGS OUT HOW YOU HAVE FELT ALONG YOUR JOURNEY – AND HOW YOUR EMOTIONAL INJURY WAS ACTIVATED AND LED YOU TO ACCEPT THINGS THAT WERE NOT TRUE ABOUT YOU.

 

Q2.  WHAT IS TRUE ABOUT YOU NOW?

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Q3. HOW CAN THE OBSESSIVE EMOTIONS BE PUT INTO THE RIGHT PERSPECTIVE.

 

Q4.  HOW CAN YOU LEARN TO GET THE MESSAGE FROM THE POSTMAN AND LET THE POSTMAN GO?

 

Q5.  HOW CAN YOU LEARN THAT THIS WAS THE WAY FOR THE UNIVERSE TO GET YOUR ATTENTION THAT WAS STUCK?

 

Q6. ANGER AND BARGAINING ARE NOW WASTE-OF-TIME EMOTIONS.  THEY WILL NOT PRODUCE YOUR HIGHEST POTENTIAL AND WILL KEEP YOU STUCK MORE.  WHAT IS THE BEST WAY THAT YOUR BODY AND YOUR ENERGY CAN LET THESE GO – SO YOU CAN FEEL A SENSE OF PEACE AND CALM AND ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF YOUR OWN SELF?

 

Q7. 6 MONTHS DOWN THE ROAD –WHEN YOU LOOK BACK AND YOU CAN SEE THE SMALL CHANGES YOU MADE AND YOU ARE THANKFUL YOU MADE THESE.  YOU HAVE STRENGTH, LOVE, FAMILY, MONEY, GOD, BUSINESS INSIGHTS AND A NEW UNDERSTANDING OF YOURSELF. HOW DID YOU DO THIS?

 

Q8. YOU NEEDED A PERSPECTIVE OF YOU BEING YOUR TRUE SELF AND NOT SOMEONE WHO NEEDS ANOTHER PERSON TO SHOW YOUR STRENGTHS TO YOU.  YOU BECAME THE OWNER AND AUTHORITY OF YOUR SELF. 

A). WHEN YOU SEE YOURSELF LIKE THIS WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

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B).  WHEN YOU DO NOT SEE YOURSELF LIKE THE OWNER – BUT THE TENANT ASKING SOMEONE ELSE TO VERIFY WHO YOU ACTUALLY ARE AND THEY DO NOT – WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

 

Q9.  WHAT IS YOUR LEARNING FROM THIS WHOLE EXPERIENCE?

 

Q10.  DOES THE LEARNING FEEL PERMANENT?

 

Q11.  YOU NEED TO REPEAT A BEHAVIOUR TO MAKE IT PERFECT.  SO REPEATING SELF-BELIEF IS IMPORTANT.  WHAT WAYS WILL YOU MAKE TO REPEAT BEHAVIOUR THAT UPHOLDS YOUR OWN RESOURCES AND DOES NOT INVALIDATE YOU?  MAKE A LIST OF THESE BEHAVIOURS THAT YOU DO FROM THE MOMENT YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING TILL THE MOMENT YOU SLEEP -EACH AND EVERY DAY? 

 

Q12.  WILL ALL OF THIS UNDERSTANDING MAKE IT NORMAL FOR YOU NOT TO GET SUCKED IN BACK TO SELF-DEFEATING BEHAVIOUR? HOW WILL IT OR HOW WILL IT NOT?

 

WHY DID IT HAPPEN?

 

Narcissists Dig Into Your Rejection:

 

This is the replay of the child’s attachment injury in adulthood. Waiting to be given permission by someone outside to feel accepted, loved and seen. 

 

Not having a strong enough experience in knowing what being loved, being secure and being validated by myself feels like.

 

This child or adult has no learning curve of the positive reinforcement required for their own self and hence is caught up in this psychological loop of manipulation by a narcissist.

 

Narcissists know how to dig deeper into the pain of rejection to weaken and bring to their knees people with this kind of emotional injury.

 

Training Yourself is the Solution:

 

Knowledge about this emotional injury and the erroneous construct that we have inadvertently created has to change.  The good news is that it is changeable. The good news is that the difficult thing here is the diagnosis of yourself being in an emotionally vulnerable place owing to your injury.

 

Now that you know the whole picture, take steps every day, no matter how tiny, to train yourself in what the feelings of being loved, encouraged, praised, by your own self – looks like.  The inner sense of self that was never developed has to be excavated and built from scratch – to be the sense of love you feel within.

 

I do not need any outside person’s validation/acceptance/approval/green signal to know, live, be my true, authentic self – without the conditioned reflexes that got ingrained in me as a child.  The child looking for approval and acceptance and permission. And not getting it and hence stuck in that spot. Frozen till now. 

 

That was then when I was a child.  Today I am an adult and I can decide to build this emotional muscle.

 

So today I DECIDE. Now I unfreeze.  Now I take my power into my own hands. Now I make that decision to be my own parent, my own someone, my own approver, my own validator, my own strongest core self – the one who needs me to be on her side – believing in her, accepting her, loving her, approving of her – right this second.  I OWN MY POWER AND QUALITIES I THOUGHT WERE MISSING OR ABSENT.

 

They are all my CORE QUALITIES.  MY CORE VALUES.  I EMBRACE THEM NOW.  I LIVE THEM NOW.

 

I walk, talk, eat, sleep and awake my core values and core essence.  The parts of me I accept as me for now and all time to come.  I am truly blessed and loved.

 

 

TOXIC POWER EXCHANGE:

 

My Universe:

 

When I gave you the power to love me and to decide for me, I did it innocently.  This innocence is my best quality too. Of trusting and believing.  It is the way I choose to love. 

 

I do not make excuses for my love, innocence and purity.  I do not guilt or shame or scold myself for this purity I possess.  I am not disordered or toxic. I pride myself on my innocence. I now know that the Universe’s love I disconnected myself from - is eternal and everlasting and is ever-present for me.  I now connect to the part of me that is connected to this love and wholeness of my Universe and learn and feel the feelings of knowing that I am love, I am whole and I am my own provider and trainer as guided by myself.

 

I did not know at that time that we would end in this way.  That there would be so many layers of opacity around you.  I am clear and transparent and thought you would be too. Especially since we shared everything in the way that we did.

 

But this is a different level of toxicity as it involves activating my attachment injuries and triggers that have prevented me from seeing the real, true picture of what was going on.  It fooled me and I gave you the permission thinking you were honest.  But you were not. 

 

I did not know. 

 

Cancel The Subscription:

 

As I accorded you with the power - gave you the power - I can take it back too. I cancel the subscription.

 

Such a callous way to reciprocate my love.  Still, I’m only waiting only for the 'pacifier from my mum.'  The nod of approval, the hint of praise or a little smile. A look, if you will.

 

I see now that I am the parent.  And I parent myself now.

 

My Core Self:

 

I recognize now that my CORE is inbuilt and inherent – is still there within me -- intact.  It got coded incorrectly out of training that I could not control.  But now, I can direct this training and will re-train myself into connecting with the actual core of me – that has been trying its best to align with me.  That is the reason for all this unrest within me.  It is the shout-out of my own core to me so I can stop and listen and re-align to it and to my truth so the balance of my life is spent in my authentic power. My original true nature and not anything else.  I have only one life in this physical form here and I intend to live it in my truest expression of self.

 

 

I HAVE FOUND MY CORE SELF: Parent With Tender-Loving-Care:

 

I parent myself with TLC, love and interest.  I connect with the knowledge that my core has sought me out – found me and I rejoice in that.  I have found my core back.

 

I know that there is wholeness, love and beauty.

 

I change my injury story.

 

I claim my Universe’s Love Story/my Divinity Story/my Being Whole Story/the I am loved Story.  I reject the Rejection Story.

 

I Test this premise and I see how when I can do this, my life situations ease and shift. 

 

I do not expect a false pacification.

 

I connect with my Sense of Self.

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Does he not care?

Am I so rejected?

Am I so unlovable?

If he loves me I can be fixed.

If he pays attention to me I am whole.

 

All these are questions that arise from the injury and disconnection to self. They will keep coming till I deliberately self-uphold - each time they come up - I choose myself.

 

Your need to be connected to him is your need to get meaning in your life.

 

Is false action/promises/behavior meaningful for you?

 

When you activate your true meaning in connection to the Universe, to Source, you start to experience life from this point and not from the point of a helpless victim.

 

Instruct your Universe to deal with the chemical addiction of this person and of the chemical of food or alcohol or anything else.  It can clear everything and it will if you let it.

 

Train yourself to not be triggered by memories, messages, injuries that activate your separation from self.  Train yourself what it means to love and look after yourself. 

 

Train yourself to know what it means to be safe in your life.

 

Connect by saying “There’s not a doubt in my mind that Source loves me, I am powerful and I am my own power and person.  I do not accord the control of my life to someone else.  I break the trauma cords and dark dense energy of all that and connect with my brilliant dazzling, shining light within and around and in Source.”

 

If you do get activated - bear the pain of it - as you can see what it is – don’t get sucked in - bear it - it will get lesser and finally disappear completely. But it needs you to not get sucked in.  

 

You have to keep trying hard. Keep swatting away the triggers even though they reappear. And they will.  For a long time to come. It is not a one-time solves all kinds of effort.  It is connected to your trigger. You feel the trigger, you do the swatting work.

 

This trigger is relentless.  It has a charge that is strong.  It needs to be neutralized every time it comes up.  It will be difficult in the beginning to align.  You will be bombarded with all kinds of thoughts. 

 

But subsequently, slowly but surely, after you put effort into it – you will start to walk and talk differently.  You will spend long hours and days – not thinking and obsessing and the recurrence of this thought and its charge will reduce.  The stranglehold it has on you will decrease and you will find that you are more confident of the beautiful person you are and the true essence that radiates from you is that of your core qualities and values.  Most of all it is your refreshing innocence and belief in yourself and in love.

 

You are not bitter or cynical.

 

You are connected and have been graced with an understanding that does not cause friction within you anymore.

 

You can see the triggers and the before and after behaviors – all at one glance – and only be activated by your alignment with your inner essence of who you truly are.

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